Fly Fishing Sport of Kings

Let's jump right to the end of this story.(no fish harmed in the writing of this article.) The only damage was to Ego,self-esteem,pride and pocket book. The former being broken, the latter only bruised. I hope I got that right. I always confuse the former with latter.(O' well).

Now approaching my 62th. birthday, with thoughts on how to spend those golden years and green dollars. Being of sound mind and body I decided to wreck both at one time because at my age there's not much time left.

That's right I was going to master the manly art of fly fishing. I was going to need a few things. First stop was at the huntin, fishin, gettin, big box outdoor store.

I watched as the old as oil(west Texas crude that made this chain of stores what it is today). Stone faced steely eyed medusa of a cashier.(I would say about my age). Sneered disapprovingly at my purchases. As if to say they had mid-life crisis wrote all over them. Here husband now he's got a crisis.

She remarked "Do you wanna beg for the small stuff."
No I quiped."I will be paying cash today thank you."
"Please double beg it." But the joke was wasted o"well if it's not fun for everyone.

For it was I who's got to figure out how to get all this home on my motorcycle. I should have drove the jeep, but it was loaded down with kayaks.(So many choices).

The young man bagging my goods. Sighed wondering out loud.
"Gee it must be nice."
"I wonder when I'll have the  money to fish and see the world."
I was thinking the same thing, but about myself. I bet he won't have any hair left to flick out of the way to see his phone by that time. Maybe he'll be ready and able to see the world then.

But wait we're not done yet we must pay tribune to amazon. They're great but they have so much stuff, and I have so little money. So we compromised, I got a little of there stuff and they got all my money.

The Fed-Ex man has came So many times the dog don't even bark at him anymore. She still barks at the mailman cause he only comes once a day. Even the dog knows mailman bring bad fed-ex bring good.

While waiting for my ship to come in, not the financial one it sank in the parking lot of the big box store,but the cargo one I need to haul all this down to where the fish are. It struck me then we fly fishermen don't use boats we walk in the water up stream no less.(SPORT OF KINGS), but not Vikings' cause they had a boat.

Now after being plundered by the private concerns it's the governments turn. A fishing license in no way resembles a drivers license. A drivers license implies that you are competent, and have mastered all skills granted by the license. A fishing license on the other hand grants you the right but makes no claims of skill or competence.

In that sense a fishing license more resembles a marriage license. You've passed no difficult test.(that will come later). To make matters worse the fisherman has probably watched more YouTube videos On catching his prize than the marriage applicant.(results may vary).

By now you may be having some doubts about my outdoor writers skill. Rest assured I'am sitting outside on my deck as I write this.

If your staring into your screen at this point blankly, as I'am as I write this. I've heard of writers block, I've had enough to build a house. I not aware of readers block as a condition. Let's just say you have crossed a few hurdles if you came this far slog on.

There is one more license, a poetic license. It's free they don't give it to you, you take it. That's why so often it's a crime. I've abused mine so often it's tattered and worn. A lot like this story.(barely readable).

Well we have talked about marriage, government, mid-life crisis, retirement, money, amazon and dogs. All the major topics, let's see what haven't we discussed. Oh yes the fish.Well that about does it for part one of this story.

If you get to the end of this story before I do, and there's still no fish. Leave a comment in the comment section and I'll see what I can do.

This is Papa Randy and I'am

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